March 3rd
It has been a couple days since my last post so I thought it is time for an update. Log seems to be getting a bit stronger each day. Today was better than yesterday. We are happy for the small steps forward. She woke up with some pain and a headache and nausea but by mid day she felt better.
We are mastering the feeding tube and it doesn’t seem to be such a big deal anymore. Only a cancer mom might think feeding your child through a tube isn’t a big deal, but really it isn’t. It is kind of like having a newborn baby. The worst part is getting up every 4 hours to change the bag. The feeding tube has actually been a blessing. It has alleviated a lot of stress around eating. If Logan doesn’t feel up to eating a full meal, now it is not a big issue. I know she is getting her nutrition in other ways and she can take the time she needs to for her appetite to come back. I can relax. It is all good.
Loggie had a busy weekend with lots of visitors. It made her happy to have people around. Today, I drove her to school so she could see her friends. Everyone was excited and welcoming and I couldn’t hold back the tears. The school loves and misses her and her friends truly are her best medicine. They treated her like just like a normal friend who had been away on a vacation or something. Oh, how I wish that was the case.
In talking to the teachers at the school who don’t teach her, it dawned on me. Logan has connected so many people though this site and you haven’t even met her. Most of you don’t know anything about Logan other than the fact she is an 10 year old girl with a brain tumor.
Logan is so much more her disease. She is super smart and has always done exceptionally well in school. She is really, really funny and witty in a “too wise for her age” kinda way. She always will be the first to say what everyone else is thinking. She is an “old soul” and has knowledge that most of us spend a lifetime acquiring. She has a peaceful presence and is loving and trusting of those around her. She has the most beautiful smile, it lights her up. Everyone says she has a sparkle.
That being said, she is still is only a 10 year old girl. She thinks most boys are gross. She loves her best friends and has a new one almost every week. She is artistic and creative and spends hours doing arts and crafts. She fights with her brother all the time. LOVES playing skip bo and family game night on the wii. She loves babies. If you have one, she loves you too.
Logan is also a bit high maintenance (don’t have any idea where she gets that from???). She cares about how she looks and what she wears. At only 10 years old almost all of her money to go towards her wardrobe.
She is a fish, or at least she was in a previous life. If she could she would swim everyday she would. One the worst things about cancer for Logan is that having low counts means not being able to go to the swimming pool. Because of this she takes at least 4 baths a day- not even joking.
In a nutshell Logan is just pretty awesome and as such she attracts awesome people into her life, like all of you.
We are back at the hospital Thursday and Friday for some blood work and meetings with the doctors and then it is official-
Radiation begins on Monday.
Instead of going on again about how I am feeling about starting radiation, I will leave you all with this story from the ICU the day after Logan’s surgery.
It was early morning and Dr. Steinbok was doing rounds. He approached Logan’s bedside and was greeted by Patty, the ICU doctor that runs the ward.
Patty is the best. She a short, lovely asian lady with a funny personality. She makes you feel so comfortable and at ease that sometimes you forget that you are in probably one of the worst places in the world, the ICU.
Dr. Steinbok exchanged greetings with Patty and he asked her how she was.
“Tired Paul, (that is his first name) I wish I could win the lottery”
Dr. Steinbok looked puzzled so he asked “Why on earth would you like to win the lottery Patty?”
She rolled her eyes “Ummm, so, I wouldn’t have to work”
At that moment Dr. Steinbok took Logan’s hand and began examining her. “If I won the lottery I’d still work you know, because I love what I do…”
I piped up “Actually, because you work, so many people do win the lottery, Dr. Steinbok”
Logan opened her eyes weak and tired she raised her head from the bed so she could look directly into her doctors eyes. “Yes, like me, I guess I have won the lottery a 3 times now.”
We all started laughing. We love witty, sarcastic Logan. Head cut open, shiny stitches running down her neck, tubes hanging all over and her heart rate machine beeping like crazy. She looked at us one last time before she laid back down.
“Maybe we should stop buying tickets”
